Impeach
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July 4, 2008
Former Senator Jesse Helms Dies; Nation Celebrates
SOUTHERN NORTH CAROLINA: Former senator Jesse Helms (R-Hell)
died today, sparking a national celebration in towns
all over America.
>> Read more...
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July 3, 2008
Gitmo Detainees Claim Immunity Under Telecomm Act
GUANTANAMO BAY: Suspected terrorists held incommunicado since the
9/11 terrorist attacks say that they have immunity from prosecution
under the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act (FISA).
>> Read more...
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July 3, 2008
Universe Collapsing, Say Scientists
CALIFORNIA: Using recent observations, scientists say the
universe has stopped expanding and
is starting to retract.
>> Read more...
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July 2, 2008
Papoon Denounces Trojan War
TROY, NY: "Helen of Troy went willingly with Paris, leaving her unwanted
first marriage. I support the rights of women to be seduced by whomever
they want," said the Surrealist Party candidate in a press release.
>> Read more...
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July 2, 2008
Homosexual Eases Into 100 Final At Olympic Trials
OREGON: Tyson Homosexual easily won his semifinal for the 100 meters at the U.S.
Olympic track and field trials and seemed to save something for the
final later Sunday.
>> Read more...
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PREVIOUS STORIES
July 02, 2008: Rock Group 'Kansas' Destroyed In Explosion
July 02, 2008: Latest Papoon Gaffe: Boat Named "Swift"
July 01, 2008: Obstetrics Division Of American Medical Association Endorses Obama
July 01, 2008: Bin Laden's Wives Move To CA To Marry As Lesbians
June 30, 2008: Papoon Supporters Change Middle Names To "Not Insane"
June 30, 2008: Senators Vitter, Craig Co-Sponsor Federal Marriage Amendment
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